Wish I knew then…

Met another Dude on here playing the same game as me and the Dudette.  He’s in the first week.  Here’s what I wish someone would have told me.

  • It’s better to identify and empathize with the anger than to rail against it.
  • Remember these words “I love you but I don’t like how you are treating me right now.”
  • Walk away.  They will always follow.  When they ask why you are walking away they are ready to listen.
  • They always want attention.  Any kind will do good or bad.  Ignore the bad behavior as best as you can.
  • It’s a Roller Coaster.  The things you think they will appreciate they won’t, the things you don’t think twice about will touch their hearts.  They’ll turn on you.  They’ll press your buttons and drive you insane.  They’ll put their fingerprints on your soul and you will think about them for the most part from here on out.
  • You are doing great.  Forgive her and more importantly forgive yourself.  Take care of yourself.  If the plane is going down you put your own mask on first then the child’s.  Same concept applies.  If you don’t take care of yourself you are no good to them.
  • Abide.


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10 Responses to Wish I knew then…

  1. burbanmom says:

    Wow, Mike, lots of wisdom in those words. It sounds like you’re ready for anything! Congrats on learning the hard stuff first!! 🙂

  2. Kristine says:

    Great advice. Where did you plagiarize it from? Remember the Mr Burke incident!! (No really, it is really, really good advice). You’re doing great. I’m proud of you. 🙂

  3. (*tear*)
    awe, Dude – I would never guessed all of this about you. Of course I only know of you via our Twitter connection and joint interest in RMB, but you didn’t seem like a guy who would be so in touch with such things. I am really touched by your entries, this one being my favorite — where were you when I was raising my children with a step-father who was so unkind to them, and me. You should have a show like Dr. Phil or something —- DUDE – such wisdom. Thank you for sharing your heart with us.

  4. Allison says:

    Great advice. All I would add is “You’re going to grieve over the difference between what you though would be and what is. Don’t sweat it. Just grieve and keep on going.”

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