Take the good, take the bad…

All in all a decent evening.  We all went to “talk” to some folks to help us take it easy.  Lot of paperwork and such but Little Walter did fine.  Have to say I’m trying to adjust still to this new life and creature who demands my attention at all times.  It is far harder than I imagined.  The newest wrinkle is I’ve become a bit of an enforcer around here.  He simply listens to the Dude better than the Dudette.  Tonight the Dudette bailed on me to lie down with him at bedtime.  I had to play hardass and piss him off to get him to finally lie still.  He of course passed out within minutes of settling down and I made my escape.  (I know many say ‘don’t lie with them’ but Walter’s my kid and with all he’s been through I’m following my gut on this one and to hell with what happens down the road when it has to stop.  For now I feel he needs it and I’ll be damned if I’m making something harder on him now because I don’t want to be challenged 6-months to a year from this moment.)

So I saunter out from his bedroom and say to Dudette in my ‘its sarcasm but it’s that low level I’m barely trying level of sarcasm’ that’s guaranteed to piss her off even if I’m telling her about a sale at Macy’s, “so I’m in charge of getting him asleep now?”  To which she replied, “I knew he wasn’t going to for me so I just let you do it.”  “Ok,” I say and walk away pissed off.  God bless her.  She’s doing the best she can and he is tough on her.  I didn’t mind doing it tonight or doing it tomorrow.  I just want him to respect her and listen to her like me. That’s not going to happen if I pinch hit every time he seems ‘Namish.

There is a visit with BM tomorrow as well and I need to remember how stressful that can be for both my dudes.  I don’t mind sitting with him till he drifts off.  I just hate having to be the bad guy to get him to chill and go to sleep.  Then I spend the remainder of my evening desperately trying to blog funny and kicking myself for not being better or simply having enough brains to find a better way for them both.

At least I have a plan.  Tomorrow I will do the best I can and see what works.  Abide.

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