Well bedtime was 90% good and Little Walter decided to hold his mischief for the final step. I lied with him for a bit then got up and told him I was going to the restroom and I’d be back to check on him. This allows me to A.) Go to the restroom and B.) he usually falls asleep before I return because I eat a lot of meat.
This time I’m chilling out and he starts to open the door! I curl up into the Scrunch of Shame and yell that I’m already in there. He gets all bent out of shape that I raised my voice and storms back into bowling alley slamming the door. Now I know we have a no yelling rule in this house that I have broken as well as him, but I pay the rent. I reserve the right to yell at someone to protect myself at my most vulnerable state. So I went back into the bedroom and tell him he can go now if he wants. He says “NO!” I say good night and leave. He comes out and starts looking for air freshener. He says he ain’t going in there because it stinks. I know this isn’t true because I went all turtle head and got stage fright when the door jiggled. He eventually peed and went to bed alone mad. Not the best finish but we touched all the bases. I attribute 90% of his feisty-ness this evening to being tired.
Some questions from cafemom:
How do I deal with the stress? I’m pretty sure I’m developing a tumor as I type this. Right now there is not a lot of relaxation going on as we are all adjusting still. Not to mention all of the hustle that comes with his care. Visits, counseling and so forth. My wife and I are a good tag team though and she helps very much.
How do I feel about all my time being taken up by this little boy? This is has been tough to deal with. Right now I feel like I give him all my attention then at the end of the day the wifey wants to talk but I’m just too wiped and want to stare at the wall. Then I yell or snap at her and she leaves me alone, then the cat meows at me and I yell at it.
How it feels when the boy is continually being mean or not bonding, etc? I don’t take the name calling personally because it’s coming from a place of frustration not real legitimate anger at me. As far as not bonding I feel we are. The birth mom is a wedge between us right now I feel. I also feel like he catches himself loving us, enjoying us and being happy and that spurs tantrums and mood changes too. I always remind myself how much he’s been through and when you think about it you realize it’s a miracle he smiles or takes a spelling test at all.
Hope this answers some of your questions. 🙂